Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Call It Till You Stall It

If you happen to be a fan of Fox News, or Hannity, you probably share the view that Democrats 'cheated' in passing Health Care using political 'tricks'. Glenn Beck will likely have diagramed it for you.

It won't matter to you if those 'tricks' have been used by Republicans in the past with no fanfare, because that doesn't matter to those media pundits you admire.

Your pundits have told you, around the clock, and nearly every day since the bill passed, how fraudulent they think it is. If not fraudulent, then at least unconstitutional. Hannity, et al, will point to the dozen or so states whose Republican governors have started lawsuits challenging the bill's constitutionality.

No matter that most legal experts (even Republican ones) say the suits have no real merit, talking it up as a federal power-play against states rights pushes the right-wing buttons on freedom-loving survivalist militias everywhere. Hey-Ho, Hutaree! And if you are an O'Reilly fan, most likely your buttons got a tickling too.

Well, OK, and interesting play there, ladies and gents of the conservative press, and purse-lipped sore losers across the nation (suit-happy governors most definitely included). Let the story play out.

Will calling Health Care a fraud and unconstitutional 100 times an hour, 24/7, make people believe it so? Will touting a legal revolt in a minority of states outweigh the resolute acceptance of the majority? If Fox can make it so, it will.

Call It Till You Stall It ... from the folks who claim to be 'fair and balanced...'

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Party Planning

While engaging in the ritual self-flagellation of watching Fox News, a couple of thoughts popped into my head. One was I have serious masochistic tendencies, but I've known that since I was six. The other was new: why is there a Republican Party?

I mean, I know why we USED to have a Republican Party, by why do we STILL have one? The party my father knew as the GOP he wouldn't recognize today. He'd equate the current Republican Party to the John Birch Society, or something similarly fringe and irrelevant.

And if my father took a look at the current Democratic Party, he'd see in its sub-groups the core of what he would call Republicans. People who believe in modest-sized government, fiscal responsibility, and change only when absolutely needed. Whether you call them Blue Dog Democrats, or not, these representatives seem to fill the niche handled mostly by the Republicans until the George W. Bush Administration.

I am clearly not a political expert, so I can't put my finger exactly on when the Grand Old Party changed to something darker, meaner, and more intolerant, but if pressed I'd guess it was in the months immediately after 9/11. The Republican Party learned how to play to fear. They learned all it took to win was to frighten Americans with tales of dire consequences. In the face of those tactics, Democrats - or even old-school Republicans, who preferred to legislate based on reason and compromise, were helpless.

Leveraging fear worked wonderfully for Republicans, until the middle of the second term for George W. Bush. By then, every scrap of adrenaline had been squeezed out of us citizens. Our 'fear button' had been pressed so hard and so often, it began to have little effect. We yawned and said, "Yeah, Right ..."

And then came Health Care. At virtually every point along the way, the Republicans opted out of meaningful engagement and chose the path of fear. Nurturing the idea that President Obama was a closet socialist - or worse, and that Health Care was Step One in the grand plan for abolition of our freedoms. The same group that defended George Bush's secret, unauthorized, wiretaps of private citizens; the GOP that rubber-stamped his "If the President orders it, it's not illegal" policy, claimed that an attempt to widen Health Care for more Americans was a step towards dictatorship.

It was another play on fear, the only plank left in the bare Republican political platform.

And it leaves them irrelevant. The Democrats are a broad party, politically speaking. Groups within the Dems fought hard for conservative approaches to Health Care. Democrats fought with other Democrats to remove the public option, for example. Who needs Republicans, when you have perfectly sound conservatives among the Dems?

So here's my thought: Split the Democrats by moving the Blue Dogs, Pro-Lifers, and other conservatives into a new GOP. That would leave liberals and middle-of-the roaders in the Democratic Party. Then reconstitute the current Republican Party as a smaller third party extremist group under a different name. (Or hire them all as official Fox News consultants - they are anyway.)

And thus, restore balance to the universe ...

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Two and a Half Men, Times Ten (or so)

I like Chuck Lorre's sitcom 'Two and a Half Men'. I am not afraid to admit it. I've become accustomed to its charms, you might say.

And I've become used to getting a daily dose of the show. Where I live it plays in back-to-back reruns beginning at 7 pm every weekday.

The only chink in this paradise of lightweight wit is this: that local channel shows the same ten (or so) episodes over and over. In fact in might be less than ten - the relentless reruns are beginning to extinguish my ability to distinguish discrete plots, with one Charlie/Alan verbal exchange seeming much like another. Good thing they still make me laugh.

But here's what puzzles: the show's been on the air since 2003. Surely there must be more than ten (or so) episodes to rotate in syndication. Or have the owners (Mr. Lorre?) of the rights restricted the number of shows they'll allow on air? Perhaps in order to spur sales of season DVDs?

If so that's too bad. The new episodes of Two and a Half Men are OK, but are starting to suffer a bit. The characters are starting to stray from type, and with those slight but significant shifts some of the jabs and zings are beginning to fall flat.

Maybe Chuck Lorre and his staff are spending too much time on their other show, 'Big Bang Theory', which seems funnier every week, and don't have any 'juice' left over for 'Men'. Or perhaps Charlie Sheen has too many personal distractions, or Jon Cryer might be too comfortable with his new career stability. Whatever the reason, the new shows don't make up for the lack of fresher looks at gems from the back catalog.

Please Mr. Lorre, free more old shows from the dustbin and let us, your loyal (but testy) fans, out of the temporal vortex that is Two and a Half Men syndication.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Mars, Please, and Step On It!

One of the biggest obstacles to sending people to Mars is the time it takes to get there - and back. I don't know about you, but I balk at the idea of spending up to three years in space confined to a ship less roomy than a VW minibus.

But a former shuttle astronaut and current physicist, Franklin Chang-Diaz, has thought up a way to get there faster. At least his Texas-based 'Ad Astra Rocket Company', has. They've come up with a rocket called a Variable Specific Impulse Magnetoplasma Rocket (or VSIMR, gotta have acronyms).

Their design uses electricity to convert a fuel like hydrogen into a very, very, hot plasma which is then ejected out nozzles, using a magnetic field to direct the flow.

Apparently this rocket can accelerate a Mars-bound vessel up to 35 miles per second (roughly 126,000 mile per hour). This speed allows a ship to reach the red planet in as little as 39 days, even given that half the time in route is needed to turn the ship around and use the engines to decelerate for Mars orbit.

A bit more than a month scrunched up in a tin condo with other humans - and with no way to get away - will still test your manners, but is less likely to lead to deep space homicide.

Cool idea, but let's not get carried away (ahem). Chang-Diaz will be testing his engine for real in 2013, but just a low-power version. Only time (and space?) will tell whether his vision will translate into the intrasystem version of a bullet train.

Poetry Break: Roosters in the Dark

I was thinking about the upcoming healthcare vote and an image of a cockfight popped into my head ... weird ...

Who rules the roost, when the roosters fight?

Who sees the light, on a moonless night?

Who finds their place, when none know the way?

Who lives to fight, another day?

Craven courage

Witless wisdom

In surplus we find these gifts

Especially in Washington

Where partisan rift

Sees lost roosters scrabbling in the dark

Unable to strike

Monday, March 15, 2010

Kill The Messenger

I am willing to bet Mr. James Sikes wishes he'd driven his blue Prius off a cliff, instead of panic-braking his way into the crosshairs of Toyota's lawyers and attack-dog government supporters.

My family owns a slightly older blue Prius and I've given strict instructions to the troops: If that car accelerates unintentionally, don't call 911. Whatever calamity results from the runaway might be less painful than the public flaying Toyota and it's minions will put you through.

The story the company presents is this: Mr. Sikes, in an apparent pique of disappointment with the customer service he was receiving, decided to fake the incident by applying his brakes and accelerator off and on 250 times during that last drive. It had to be a fraud, they say, because in the Prius if you fully depress the accelerator and also press the brakes more than half way to the floor, the engine overrides and the car slows.

That's how the company explains what their investigators and the NHTSA discovered: the front brakes were completely spent, with no pad material remaining, and the caliper seals so overheated they were melted. The rear brakes were in normal shape.

If Toyota's charges (and that's really what they are) against Mr. Sikes were presented in court, and if I were a juror, I'd be skeptical that Mr. Sikes was skillful enough to fake a runaway while convincingly melting his front brakes (but not ruining the rear brakes).

I would also wonder if the override system in the Prius worked if the accelerator was pressed only 3/4 of the way and not absolutely floored. An electronic malfunction resulting in unintended acceleration might not actually move the physical pedal that much. In such case would the override work?

I'd also have to ask myself, what would be the motive for faking this? Mr. Sikes wasn't suing Toyota. He doesn't seem to be a publicity seeker. And, sure, customer relations with dealerships can be rocky, but what would be gained by potentially trashing your car - or losing your life, in the attempt to convincingly stage a runaway?

Finally, on the claim that investigators were unable to reproduce unintended acceleration in Mr. Sikes car, I'd say 'so what?' Millions of motorists at some time in their ownership lives have run across an intermittent glitch that magically goes away at the dealer, but reappears, sometimes within minutes of driving away with the problem undiagnosed. Once, all the analog (but computer controlled) gauges in my 1999 Volkswagen TDI suddenly displayed abnormally high readings - noticed when I was reported as going 20 mph while motionless at a stoplight. I turned off the engine and restarted and all was normal and the incident never repeated. Good luck finding that problem.

Now it may be Toyota is correct and that Mr. Sikes was a disgruntled customer with an axe to grind, but if the company's claim and evidence were introduced in a criminal court today, the case would not pass the test of reasonable doubt. Yet Toyota, it's Congressional friend Senator Darrell Issa (R-California), and much of the media have already tried and convicted James Sikes.

Apologies over. Kill The Messenger seems the new strategy.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Toyota: Cruising Out of Control?

Toyota is drowning in bad publicity. And it results not just from reports of 'unintended acceleration', another of which splashed across the headlines this week, it's Toyota's inability to recognize and fix the problem that is causing greatest harm to the company's reputation.

Reports of runaway Toyotas - going both forward and in reverse, have been flooding in - and not just from recent models. A constant claim in these reports has been the cars were checked by local Toyota specialists and no defects were found. They couldn't even recreate the problem, leaving the owners frustrated and fearful.

Toyota can't afford for this situation to continue much longer. If nothing is done, and more lives are lost, people will stop driving their cars and demand compensation en masse.

My wife drives a 2006 Prius, which is not on any recall (I've removed the floor mats as a precaution), so I am definitely interested in the problem. And I think I know where Toyota should look to find a resolution, and it's not installing a kill switch (although I recommend it).

I will preface my next statement, as I usually do when I am about to say something on which I have no technical knowledge, by admitting 'I am not a mechanic and have no technical understanding of Toyota's cars'.

That said, I have a suggestion: Toyota - look at your cruise control system, both hardware and software. And look at the cruise control usage of the drivers who have reported unwanted acceleration. There have been reports of issues with Toyota cruise control systems, most notedly by Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak, but cruise control has not been noted as an issue in the unintended acceleration incidents featured in the headline news.

We almost never use the cruise control on our Prius, which has over 60,000 miles on it with no drivability problems. But what about the drivers of the cars involved in the incidents? Did they use it frequently? And if so, did they just leave it on all the time, relying on the auto-disconnect to return them to full control until they press 'resume'?

Perhaps the problems we are seeing are due, at least in part, to the cruise control system 'resuming' or 'accelerating' unexpectedly and incorrectly. In the latest reported incident, the 2008 Prius driver stated that while accelerating to pass his gas pedal did 'something funny' and moved without his intention. Sounds like cruise control to me.

At least, when a car accelerates on its own, cruise control should be suspected, since that's what cruise control does - allows the car to adjust speed without driver input.

But then again, I'm not an engineer. Toyota has lots of them. Let's hope at least a few are looking at cruise control for the source of this problem. Perhaps they should hire a consultant to help. I don't think Wozniak is busy ...